Picture Perfect

Mr. and Mrs. Alvear and my sweet baby boy.

Love!

Speak Out

Isn't it funny how hard it is for some of us to just say what's on our mind? You may have no problem telling your over opinionated friends she needs to chill out. It might be no sweat to tell that pushy teacher to ease up on your kid. And it's definitely no problem to tell some mouthy POS to you-know-what when they are being mean, rude or offending you. But why is it so hard when it's someone that you're closest with?

Fear. It's fear that you're going to hurt the person you're talking to. Fear of the person getting angry. Fear of causing a fight when you'd rather just keep the peace. Why is it so difficult to just open your mouth and speak the truth? Why are truth and fear directly connected to each other?

.

I found that the time I was the most open about my feelings with my significant other was when I had no fear. I wasn't worried that they would get mad, hurt or leave. I didn't mind rocking the boat because I wasn't afraid of it capsizing. But along with the freedom of my mouth being filter free, came the feeling that something was missing. The love was there, just not in the form that it should be.

.

For me, when it's real love, there is always some fear attached to it. It sounds kind of sad when I see these words on paper. It's not meant to be. I just need to find a balance that will allow the best of both worlds.

Pals

I love how Nicolas loves his family.

He told the waiter at House of Pancakes "this is my favorite cousin Dominic!"

Park Day

I took Dom to Tewinkle Park today and he loved it. We've been to parks before, but not since he's been totally mobile and able to run and walk. He had so much fun running all over the place, climbing on the jungle gym and going on the swings. There were lots of other kids there too, all older than him, and he loved that. He'd walk up to them and say "hi" in a casual, nonchalant kind of way. Some of those kids, by the way, are pretty bratty. They have no problem pushing other kids to get to the slide and run around like maniacs, almost knocking Dom over a few times. Where are the parents you ask? They are over on the bench with their Starbucks and fellow Mom friend discussing how cute it was when 8 year old Timmy threw his plate on the floor at dinner because he wanted chicken nuggets, not macaroni and cheese. Ok, ok, I guess that's sort of a generalization. Not all the Mom's are like that, but there are some that completely hang up their "Mom hat" while their kid is playing. They don't look up, they don't do a quick up glance to make sure the kid hasn't been abducted. Nothing.

There is a big sand pit behind the swings so I took Dom over to it for some sand castle building fun. I sat on the edge of the wall and stuck my feet onto the sand and sat him on my lap. As soon as I began to stand him up on the sand he lifted his legs and climbed back into my arms. Well, I wasn't expecting that! There was nothing that he liked about it. I tried showing him how fun it was to let it run through his hands but no, he was having non of it. The above photo is as close as he got to actually going into the sand pit.

There were a few dogs at the park and he was all excited, running up saying "woof woof!" If we ever got a dog, it would be fun to take him there too. We ended up playing for a couple of hours before the sun started to go down. Boo on 5pm sunsets! Dom was bummed to leave the park, but I promised we'd go back soon.

Cut Off

I have worked for my Dad for six years and for the past year, my hours were cut to part time. Business is slow and the economy still stinks so everyone is feeling the pinch. It's actually been a blessing because I have been able to spend a lot of time with Dominic for his first year of life. I got to see him crawl for the first time, take his first steps, say his first word. I supplemented my income by participating in a work share program through the government. They basically paid a portion of my wages for the days that my hours were cut. It's worked out great and I'm thankful that opportunity was there.

But unfortunately, it's come to an end. I knew it would, but I was anticipating it being at the end of December. Turns out, I used up the annual maximum per person and so my last check was in September. The worst part? I got no notice, no warning. The checks just stopped coming. Now I'm out $1,000 per month and have to figure out a solution asap. There is a slight chance I can reapply and still get some finanical assistance, but it won't be as much as before. I'm going to submit my paperwork and see what happens though.

I was dreading telling Rob because he works so hard and we were finally at a place where things were going pretty good. The bills were getting paid, we went out to eat a couple times a month, Dominic had a full bounty of toys and new clothes. I was nervous to tell him that now I have lost half my income because I didn't want him to be stressed out and upset. After really thinking about why I was nervous, I figured it out. I really wanted Rob to say "it's ok babe, I got this, don't worry." I wanted him to swoop in and save the day. I wanted him to save me.

I have never been "saved" by any man except my Father. My Dad has been the only man I have ever truly trusted 1000% to be there for me no matter what. I never doubted that if I fell, he'd pick me up without even blinking. I could count on him until the end of time. I always felt that no matter what happens in this life, I can turn to my Dad to make it all better. No judgement, no making me feel bad about it....just love. Maybe that's an unfair expectation for another man to compete with. Big shoes to fill. Maybe I set myself up to fail on that one.

Not once has a man that I have been in a relationship with ever come in and saved the day. I have always either paid the way for both of us, or split things down the middle. I'm not saying I want someone to totally support me for the rest of my life so that I can sit around and do nothing...I pride myself on being independent and always taking care of myself. But I wonder what it would be like to not worry about money all the time.

I was so caught up in wanting Rob to "save the day" when I told him about the news that I totally lost focus on the actual problem at hand. We can't afford for me to work part time. That's a no brainier. I need to bring in more money. That's a given. Why did I think, even for a second, that this wasn't the case? It's not Rob's responsibility to make the extra $1,000 appear out of no where. He's already working two jobs. The truth is I just wanted to feel taken care of by my man and have him miraculously come up with a solution and the extra money. I feel sort of ashamed to admit that, because that's so not who I am. I have never expected anyone to carry me, so why was I yearning for that response?

I finally snapped out of it and remembered that this is the real world. I had to pull my head out of the clouds and refocus. Rob and I are a team. We both need to be pulling our weight. As much as I love and cherish my my never ending and tireless job as a Mom and as a "wife," it's a non paying gig. So even though I know I'm working my ass off all day every day, unless someone is cutting me a check, it's not going to fly.

The best part about all this is, when I told Rob, he wasn't mad or upset. He didn't make me feel bad about it. He was logical in his thinking and actually made me feel better about the whole thing by talking to me about it in a calm and interested way. It turns out he did make me feel taken care of... by reminding me that we are a team. We're a family and we do this together.

My plan is to ask my Dad for more hours. I'm not sure it's even a possibility, but it's worth a shot. Plan B is to find a new job, which I (and my Dad) would be heart broken about. The other sad fact is that my baby will have to go to daycare full time. That means our Monday and Friday time together is a thing of the past. I'll miss spending the day with him, running our errands, going to the park etc. But I'm thankful I got to spend his first year with him, watching him hit all his milestones with flying colors.

This is all part of the journey and we'll get through it like we always do.

Got a dollar?

I saw this the other day and thought I'd pass it along:

7 Good Things to do with a Dollar

1. Buy from a lemonade stand, a bake sale, or another fundraiser
2. Leave a dollar in a vending machine for someone else to find it
3. pay the toll for the car behind you
4. buy a sheet of stickers and hand them out to kids
5. put four quarters in parking meters
6. tip a street musician
7. send a thank you card to someone who made a difference in your life

Splitting Hairs

Dom knows how to grow a full head of hair. He's had about 7 haircuts since he was born. The stuff is thick and dense and just keeps growing!



Usually we take him to "Cool Cuts for Kids" where he sits in an airplane or fire engine while watching cartoons on the tv in front of him. Pretty smart set up for kids, but it takes forevvvver for the stylist to finish. They always go soooo slow, taking their time and then some. By the time we leave, we're out $20 and 45 minutes!



Dom is now a connoisseur so he no longer needs that baby stuff so this time we took him to Super Cuts by our house. We brought his little step stool from Ikea to sit on and voila! He sat in the chair like a big boy and let his stylist, Bhernard, work his magic. $13 and 10 minutes later we were outta there!

Ta Daaa! This should keep the hair out of his eyes for at least a month or two.....

Go Big Red

Our family, decked out in our Arizona Cardinals gear!

Testify

I found an email that Lanie sent to me on Novemeber 5th, 2007. It had been forwarded to her and she was sharing the goodness. Weirdest thing ever....today is Novemeber 5th, 2010. (No seriously, it is. I know. So weird, right?) So much change has happened over the past 3 years, it's nice to know that these valuable nuggets of advice are still to swallowed whole like an every day life lesson vitamin.

1. Life isn't fair, but it's still good.

2. When in doubt, just take the next small step.

3. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone.

4. Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does.

5. Pay off your credit cards every month.

6. You don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.

7. Cry with someone. It's more healing than crying alone.

8. It's OK to get angry with God. He can take it.

9. Save for retirement starting with your first paycheck.

10. When it comes to chocolate, cheese, and or comfort foods,
resistance is
futile.

11. Make peace with your past so it won't screw up the present.

12. It's OK to let your children see you cry.

13. Don't compare your life to others'. You have no idea what their
journey
is all about.

14. If a relationship has to be a secret, you shouldn't be in it.

15. Everything can change in the blink of an eye no matter what you
do... so
don't forget to close your eyes and breath every once in awhile.

16. Life is too short for long pity parties. Get busy living, or get
busy
dying.

17. You can get through anything if you stay put in today.

18. A writer writes. If you want to be a writer, write.

19. It's never too late to have a happy childhood. But the second one
is up
to you and no one else.

20. When it comes to going after what you love in life, don't take no
for an
answer.

21. Burn the candles, use the nice sheets, wear the fancy lingerie.

22. Over prepare, then go with the flow.

23. Be eccentric now. Don't wait for old age to wear purple.

24. The most important sex organ is the brain.

25. No one is in charge of your happiness except "you".

26. Frame every so-called disaster with these words: "In five years,
will
this matter?"

27. Always choose life.

28. Forgive everyone everything.

29. What other people think of you is none of your business.

30. Time heals almost everything. Give time time.

31. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.

32. Your job won't take care of you when you are sick. Your friends
will.
Stay in touch.

33. Believe in miracles.

34. Music heals, listen to it so loudly that you can't even hear your
own
voice as you sing at the top of your lungs in the shower or your car.

35. Whatever doesn't kill you really does make you stronger.

36. Growing old beats the alternative -- dying young.

37. Your children get only one childhood. Make it memorable.

38. Vote.

39. Get outside every day. Miracles are waiting everywhere.

40. If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone else's,
we'd
grab ours back.

41. Don't audit life. Show up and make the most of it now.

42. Get rid of anything that isn't useful, beautiful or joyful.

43. All that truly matters in the end is that you loved.

44. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.

45. The best is yet to come.

46. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.

47. Take a deep breath. It calms the mind.

48. If you don't ask, you don't get.

49. Yield.

50. Life isn't tied with a bow, but it's still a gift.

51. Don't save it for a special occasion. Today is special.

16 Months Cub

My little boy is such a toddler these days. 16 months old and he's turning into a whole new kid. He runs around the house with his drum sticks, banging on the walls and climbing anything we'll let him. His legs seems to have grown overnight, and when I look at him sitting in his car seat, i wonder how he got so tall!

His vocab is increasing too. Now, whenever he sees Cuddles he says "bad cat!" Yea, ok, so I taught him that, but in my defense, she is usually being annoying or scratching at something she shouldn't be. He'll also says "cracker" when he wants his goldfish or a cookie, splish splash when it's time for a bath and a few others. Here's the full list:

Dada

Mama

Yia Yia

Bappa (Bapou)

What's this/that

Cracker

Splish Splash

Bye

Hi

Waa waa (water)

Baba (bottle)

Bubba (bubbles)

Ba Ca (Bad Cat, ie Cuddles)

WOW

Uh oh

Bless (whenever someone sneezes or coughs)

Eye (while sticking his finger in my eye)

Da (yes-when he's doing his German accent)

Aye (yes- when he's doing his Irish accent)

I love how he points his tiny little finger at everything. He is still asking us "what's this" or "what's that" a thousand times a day. He knows the correct sounds for dog, cat, duck, lion, monkey, cookie monster and his newest one, a dinosaur. He also knows where to point when you ask him where his nose, teeth, eye and belly button are. We are currently working on ears and head.

With all these exciting new developments, there are also some bad habits that have shown up. In a word, crankypants. Hmmm, maybe that's two words, but never the less, Dom sure can be moody when he wants to be. He will throw his toys, push me away, make his body turn to jello and just kind of melt down. He had this fave he makes if he's mad and it's really the cutest thing ever. He furrows his browns and really makes a scowl on his face. There is no misunderstanding how he's feeling at that moment.

He's also figured out that he's pretty hilarious. If you ask him to make a funny face, he'll do this weird (and hilarious) thing where he sticks out his arms, makes them very tense and then shakes them while freezing. When I laugh he throws his head back and laughs too. He's finding new ways to express his emotions, which is good. But along with that comes more meltdowns, more struggles with just getting his pj's on sometimes and more work for Mommy.

It's kind of amazing how much more tiring it has been this past month. Now that he is fully mobile and wants to be in everything, there is no rest unless he's napping or in bed for the night. I love his curiosity and really let him try to explore as much as possible, as long as he's not in danger. He's figured out how to pull himself up into the couch and he is so proud of himself for that. He also likes the climb on the arms which could result in him falling off, so it's eagle eyes at all times. I do love how he knows how to get down though, always feet first and slides down to the floor. He loves to turn his chair upside down and find new ways of sitting or standing it. Pretty creative huh?

Monday was Dom's first time using a spoon all by himself. I was really dreading the mess it was going to make while he figured out how to get it into his mouth without spilling it. But guess what? I showed him once and he totally got it! There was very little applesauce on the floor and mostly ended up in his mouth. He loved being a big boy and feeding himself and it kept him entertained for about 20 mins! The next night we took a shot at jello and then introduced him to a fork. He stabbed at his turkey dogs and chicken and was able to get a couple on there. When he would get frustrated he'd just pick up a piece and stick it on the fork, or straight into his mouth.

Teething is still part of our life. He's got four on top and four on bottom now and his back molars are starting to come in. I have to say, he's been pretty great so far. Not too much fussing or crying. Now that he has some chompers, he loves, loves, loves to brush them. It just might be one of his favorite things to do right now.

Music is still the one thing that can stop Dom in his tracks. He loves when the various bands play on "Yo Gabba Gabba" and now will dance in the living room or in his car seat. He has figured out how to spin in a circle and it's pretty funny to watch him get dizzy and then try again.

I'm happy to say he's totally adjusted to daycare. He was pretty much there, but he was still crying when I would drop him off in the morning. For the past 2-3 weeks there have been no tears at all. It's the best feeling be able to drop off a happy baby in the morning!

He's still sleeping through the night with a typical schedule of bed at 7pm and waking up at 6:30am. I never thought I'd be getting up so early every single day, but it just seems so normal now. Even when I'm really tired and am wishing for five more minutes, as soon as I see his face, I don't even care that he woke up early at 5:30am and peed through his diaper. I'm instantly awake and ready to take of my Cub. Funny how being a Mom just kind of takes over:)