Sweet Life

I'm finding it tough to make time to update my blog. It's not that I'm not thinking of you, I am...I think of all the things I want to tell you, how BIG Domi is getting, what's new in my life. But before I know it the day is over and I'm crawling into bed. I hope you don't feel like I'm neglecting you because I'm not. I feel bad. I wish there was a way to transcribe my thoughts straight onto this blog. Maybe one day?

Right now I'm cooking dinner and uploading photos to my picasa website from my birthday. Oh man, I had SUCH an awesome time! It felt great to get out there with all my peeps and dance, drink, chat, be carefree. It was one of those rare nights where you don't really plan anything and it suddenly becomes epic.

The turn out was great, lots of peeps came to celebrate my big day and have some fun. I got to party it up with my best friend, Lanie....it had been forever...I believe the last time was her birthday last October. It was just what I needed though. She's one of those people that you ALWAYS have a good time with!!! For my birthday, Rob got me the most kick ass HD camera and I love it so much. The photos come out crystal clear and it weighs next to nothing! Lanie baked me my favorite cake, red velvet, and it said "happy birthday homeskillet" on it! I will post all the photos soon and will give you the link.


So now I'm 34 years old. How do I feel? I feel like I have grown up a bit. I feel young still, not yet cringing at my age. If you would have asked me at my last birthday where I would be in a year, I would never have guessed I'd be here. In a new relationship, with a 2 month old son. I'd never believe you if you told me certain people wouldn't be in my life anymore. I'd tell you that you were lying if you said that people I thought would be there through everything are no longer...that they jumped ship at the first rumble of change.

But, hey, life is what you make it. Everything in my world is different now, but not in a bad way. I'm deeply in love with a man that makes me happy, swoon, laugh, strive for more. I look at him from across the room and feel smitten. He's sexy and smart and funny. When we're out and about and he reaches for my hand, I feel proud to be his girl. Being in his arms is a place I can let go and exhale. He's got my back and I've got his. Hand in hand, us against the world. I see him with our son and and sometimes can't believe he's ours...we did that, we made this perfect little human being. He came from love and will always be surrounded by love.


I have a gorgeous little baby boy who I fall more and more in love with every day. He makes me feel things I never thought were possible. I see him changing right before my eyes and its amazing. He's already wanting to sit up and stand and does so with our help.

He loves to look around and all the new things in the world. Can you imagine seeing everything for the first time? He looks at me with his bright eyes and it seems he knows I'm his Momma. He fusses in his crib but as soon as I pick him up, he snuggles up on my chest, lets out a little sigh and drifts off to sleep. I hold him in my arms as he sleeps and just stare in amazement. I stroke his punk rock hair and kiss his tiny fingers that are wrapped around mine. I melt when he smiles back at me and think he's little cough is the most adorable thing on the planet. I want to burst with happiness when I see him and his Daddy together, chillin on the couch watching tv, or cuddling in bed in the morning. He knows that's his Daddy and he's so in love with him. It feels like he already hangs on his every word and wants nothing more than to make him proud.

I have the most incredible family. We are all closer than close, we all love to hang out together, we all love and respect each other. To have parents and siblings like mine is something I wish everyone could experience because it's the greatest feeling in the world.

They have always been there for me, through all the different fun and exciting times I have put them through. I've always done my own thing, whats in my heart...never afraid to go against the grain and shake things up. That can be tough to deal with over time, but they have never let me down. They have always made me feel that they are proud of me and my path...they have never asked me to be someone I'm not and that is the greatest gift of all.

I have my homegirl Lanie, who has kept my head above water since we were in the 7th grade and she's still doing it today. Without her I'm not sure I would have made it to 34 in one piece.
She has never wavered on our friendship in 20 plus years, and I know I can always count on her to be there for me, to listen, to advise, to wipe away my tears and give me brand new hope for a new day.
I have no doubt in my mind that we will be friends until the end of time, because we have faced trials and tribulations, ups and downs, good times and bad. And through it all we have stuck by each other. I am a better person because of her.

She has been my saving grace more times than I can count. She always finds a way to put things in perspective and totally gets me like no one else does. We have bizarre conversations that to us seem totally normal but to others leave them scratching their heads. She is my sister, my homeslice, my best friend.

So at 34 years old, I can safely say that life is good. Who knows what tomorrow will bring...hopefully more good stuff. Here's to another year!

Who's that Cub?

It's been some time since I last wrote, and I'm sorry about that. Time seems to escape me these days. By the time I have Domi down for a nap I need to clean his bottles, do some laundry, empty the dishwasher, and then he's up again. I'm working a couple days a week too, and he comes along with me. I wish money grew on trees....it would be pretty awesome to be a full time stay at home Mom. But I know a million Mom's have that same wish. I'm lucky I am able to have the flexible schedule that I have.

Dominic is 7 weeks old today! I can hardly believe it! He has changed in so many ways. Not only is he bigger, taller, chubbier...he's also awake longer during the day, bright eyed and looking around, focusing on objects, cooing, making lots of little noises. He smiled his first non gas smile the other day. Rob was talking to him and he broke out into a big grin...it was the raddest thing I have ever seen:) He's becoming more and more interactive and it's just more and more fun. I have a better understanding of what he needs now. When he cries, I can usually figure out if it's because he has a dirty diaper, he's hungry or he just wants to snuggle. 7 weeks doesn't seem very long, but I have learned so much. I fall in love a little more every day when I see little Cubby's face...he just keeps getting cuter and cuter.

Rob and I have had a couple nights away from the baby, which I am so thankful for. They have been huge in helping me get back to feeling normal and not so overwhelmed. Just one night where I'm able to cut loose a little bit is awesome. Spending that time with Rob as his girl, having a couple of drinks, getting out and hanging with other adults lol. I have to admit, when we left Domi with the babysitter last week for our big birthday dinner, I spent a lot of time talking about him, showing off photos. I'm one of those Moms. I never thought I would be, but I am:)


I've noticed that I do a lot of things with one hand....I usually have Domi in the other hand so it's been a skill I have acquired that I think all Mom's have. He's getting heavier now, and I don't think I'll be able to do the one handed thing too much longer, but I'm enjoying it while I can.

We're just days away from hopefully getting a new car. I have picked one out, and now we just have to go buy it. Next week is the target time, so fingers crossed.

I'm doing much better emotionally. I'm not perfect, but I feel a little more sane, not so up and down, crying at the drop of a hat. There is still some adjustments and improvements to be made, but I'm a work in progress at this point. I'm trying my best and that's all I can do.

I think overall, we're doing really well. Rob and I love our Cubby so much and we are loving every day with him. He's such a good baby and so smart already. He's already starting to hold his head up and when he does "tummy time" with Rob, he pushes his little legs and crawls all the way up, all by himself! He has his two month check up in a couple weeks and it will be interesting to see how much he weighs. He's a little chubby cubby these days and he's filling out nicely.

Life is good, and I can't wait to see what tomorrow brings.

Sleep relief

It's funny how you can go your whole like without something, and then you have it, even for a little bit, and you don't know how you lived without it. Cubby is growing bigger every day and continues to amaze me. He is much more alert now, and stays awake for longer between feedings. He loves to sit on Robs lap and look at the bookcase behind the couch. He's eating up a storm and has a really chubby little face now. His personality is starting to come out and its just the cutest thing.

He's doing much better with his sleep schedule. As i mentioned before, he was having a tough time sleeping more than 45 mins or so at a time. We put him in his bassinet in our room, but he just wasn't into it. We moved his swing into the room, and the worked for a little while but soon he was back to waking up after just a little bit. After doing some research online and getting some tips on helping him sleep for longer, we decided to move him into his own room so that he could sleep in his crib. It was a tough pill to swallow for me because I was nervous about him being so far away. Yea, ok, so his room is down the hall from ours, but if I can't just open my eyes and look at him, it's far away. But I really felt that this might help him sleep better, and also it would be better for us. I would jump up every time he fussed because I didn't want him to wake Rob up. He has to get up in the morning and go to work, and I wanted him to be able to get the shut eye he needed. My theory was that if he was in his own bed, in his room, then he could fuss a little bit before I picked him up. Cub is a noisy sleeper. He grunts and groans and kicks and makes little noises. Sometimes he'll do this but then get himself back to sleep. If I didn't rush to pick him up, then maybe he would sleep better. Well, so far so good. When he goes to bed, I keep him in his room. When he wakes up to eat or get a diaper change, I stay in his room and do it, the lights off with just the hallway light shining in a little bit. I don't talk to him or coo (which is super hard because he's so cute!) I feed him, rock him for a little bit and then lay him back in his crib, even if he's still awake. I want him to learn to get himself to sleep. As I said, this is all so hard because I want so badly to hold him in my arms until he falls asleep and just hold him like that all night, but I know I wouldn't be doing myself any favors in the long run. So we are trying to stick to this routine, and so far so good. I have the intercom on so I hear when he needs me. But I have stuck to my guns and kept him in his room. He's been a good little cub and is working with me on this. He usually will sleep for about three hours, then wake up, then a couple runs of two hours each. This is much better then up every 45 mins. Sometimes it does take him a while to settle down and not fuss, and sometimes I have to go back in there and soothe him but there is definite progress.

I'm doing better about not feeling so overwhelmed. My Mom and Dad babysat Dominic on Saturday night and it gave Rob and I a chance to get out and spend some much needed time together. I had missed it so much and felt great to reconnect and let loose a little bit. I had been a little nervous to have a drink because I wasn't sure how my body react and how it would go down, but it seems my party muscles won't take too long to bounce back:) I really think having that kind of time together once a month will really help me with this new transition and we're so lucky to have family that is willing to do that for us.

Things are going well, and Rob and I have sort of found our footing. I get up with Dom at night and then Rob usually takes him around 4 or 5am, until he has to go to work. This gives me some much needed sleep and I feel so much better when I wake up. I feel very fortunate to have someone that is willing to help out and not only that but also enjoys it. We're both really enjoying the Cubster and watching him change and grow right before my eyes. I can't believe how much he has changed in just a month, but can't wait to see what's next!